strangest fortune cookie ever

"Within the coming 5 months you will find 3 missing socks."

yeah, i'm lost on that one... just thought i'd share.

in other news, i took a break from work today to go see star wars 3... alright. nothing special. but not bad. the sad part about it is i came back to work at like 8:30 and got called to look at a problem a minute after i sat down... there's just something wrong about that

early morning sucking

so today wasn't all that bad, even with the going into work for 6 hours... not like tomorrow's gonna be when i'm supposed to be there at 9 now instead of noon like i'd planned... grrr... but yeah, tonight. dinner at macaroni grill. nice to see travis again. then down to terry's for kill bill 1. then up to dundee theater for kill bill 2. not too shabby. gonna hurt like hell in the morning though. oh well, that's what i get for having a shitty life.

temporary suicide

"Drunkenness is temporary suicide: the happiness that it brings is merely negative, a momentary cessation of unhappiness." - Bertrand Russell

very apt quote right now... probably gonna endup drinking too much (alone) tonight since i'm utterly upset about having to work this weekend when i thought i wasn't going to... probably just wishful thinking there, should've known i would be here. never get to leave this place. yeah, that's all. too angry to really go into more.

workaholic much?

ok, so probably not really... even managed to come home at 11:30 tonight... so why am i still up? avoiding going to bed because then i know that means i have to get up and go in tomorrow? nah, couldn't be... d'awww... sometimes i just really hate this place. but it all just comes back to me. i only hate it cause i don't do anything but work and i don't know anyone. but i only don't know anyone cause i don't do anything to meet people, so i just stay at work to avoid having to have an excuse for not doing anything but work. yeah, i rock.

and why is it that whenever i start to feel really lonely and depressed, i further isolate myself and withdraw? does that make sense?

always the last

last one on the floor tonight... again. let's just hope i'm smart enough to go home before 1am, unlike last night. sometimes i wonder how stupid i am, working all these hours. never doing anything else. i complain about not having a life, but then do shit like this that prevents me from having one. guess that just gives me an excuse other than i suck at meeting people.

off to a good start

so on my way back upstairs to my cube, i stopped outside the stairwell door and tried to badge in at the fire alarm... stood there a couple seconds waiting for it to beep so i could go in, then realized what a moron i was. yeah, it's gonna be a good day.

greenday

fucking rocked my face. and i liked it. a lot. watching billy joe masterbate on stage, that's just hot. as always, an amazing show. non-stop for two hours. definitely one of the best concerts out there. and it makes it so much better that they seem so genuinely glad and thankful to be there. or at least that's how it seems to me. esp during the final song of the encore (a powerful cover of we are the champions) when mike dirnt came over to our side of the stage and mouthed "thank you" maybe that's what clued me in. dunno. good damn stuff though. lookin forward to doin that up again in sept with dad and maybe even julia.

way to go drunk paul

seems like drunk paul was in full effect last night. as always. way to go with the depressing post there buddy. yeah, guess that's all i got now. went to the townie bar with emily, tracie and some folks. good times. drunk girl tryin to get on me. strangeness with t-dawg. ayup, all around clusterfuck. all it needed was me drunk dialing anna like last weekend. i'm so cool. or not. whatever, time to go shopping with emily and tracie before greenday.

tracie and/or anna

damn it all... seriously, what is fuckin wrong with me. always holding on to the past. wanting what i can't have. what i could've, but didn't have. just need to let go, but can't. always have to be the moron... easier to look back than forward. see what could have been than what is or could be. why start something new when you can keep holding on to something old?

anna, tracie, doesn't matter... never really had either one. can't let either one go. you'd think it'd matter, but at this point it doesn't. i just want someone. so i can be not alone for once. even if it's just for the night, i don't care. tired of always coming home alone. never having anyone. just need more.

me = nerd;

me = tired;
me += hungry;
me.eatAndDrink();
me.watchMovie();
me.passOutAfterWorkingSoManyHoursMyMsgIsWrittenInCode();
me = sad + pathetic;

15 hours baby...

i'm a fucking tool... that makes 51.5 hours so far this week, and there's still tomorrow and saturday... i'm a moron, aren't i?

good work pays off?

so i got a raise today. totally forgot about it till now. kinda neat feeling. maybe all my long hours and hard work actually paid off? that's how i'm going to think about it anyway. cause no matter what, i'm still working long hours, but i guess i get paid a little more now?

most expensive laptop ever

PCGGRT390ZPH Sony VAIO GRT390ZPH Intel Pentium 4 Mobile 3.2GHz 802.11b-g Wireless 16.1-inch SXGA XBRITE 2GB DDR 80GB HDD DVD+-RW Windows XP Pro Notebook PC at TigerDirect.com

so right now, we're searching for a laptop that's at least $5000... and this is what we're supposed to be doing. for work. because apparently you can't buy a laptop (even with accessories) for less because all capital purchases must be at least $5000. this is just insane. if you pick the most expensive base and add everything to it at like dell, you still can't hit that much. only if you add accessories, which doesn't count as capital until you hit $5000 for the base unit, can you hit that. wow. just, wow.

update: apparently i was wrong. we just hadn't looked at the right dell laptops. can hit that $5000 sweet spot. but that's still insane that we have to go that high.

something corporate - Down

Build my walls up
Concrete castle
Keep this kingdom free of hassle

...

But I hear sound echo in the emptiness
All around, but you can't change this loneliness
Look at what you've found, I'm falling down
Look at what you've found, I'm falling down

1980 - Wikipedia

1980 - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

happened upon this from tim bray's blog and for some reason feel like someday i want/need to be listed here. i'm sure that's just the normal human urge to be known and acheive a sort of immortality by being recorded by history.. but is that so bad?

what i plan on doing to get me there... well, that's just anyone's guess. i realize it's probably not going to happen, because let's be honest, i'm not exactly going anywhere fast. or anywhere slow for that matter. but i guess that can all change, so maybe there's still hope.

adult dinner party

so i had my first adult-like dinner party last night. was kinda cool. had cain, the kidd, edawg, bubba-dub and chris, friendy, and andrew over for steaks and beer. good damn stuff. of course i'm saying that because i prepared the steaks, so probably biased. and, of course, the beer was excellent. some john courage. asahi. mcewans. transatlantique kriek. shiner. fat tire. amber boch. easy street. cold stream porter. and the list goes on... and good shrimp cain bought at the hippy store (also where the steaks came from).

was definitely a good night. sat around and talked. looked back at all the foolish things we and others did in college. laughed. only sort of downside was when the talk turned (as it seems to always with edawg when she's around old college friends) to tracie. how she's off the deep-end with "alex" and all that. just sorta bothers me. not sure if it's cause i think tracie's better than that or what, but just doesn't sit well. probably the usual leftover lingering feelings for someone you always carry with you afterwards. whatever it is, just don't like it when she's ripping into her. especially since she claims to be friends with her. i don't doubt she is, but it just.. doesn't seem like what you do to friends.

but can't let that spoil what was an excellent night. sure, it wasn't all i'd expected it to be and was surprised that cain and the kidd (with andrew) went back to ames cause the kidd wanted to go to some graduation party or something... but still a damn good night.